Just Like Frank
First Catch your Hare (make sure
The Sorcerer Receives a Cutte)
then steer The Waterlog
to The Island of Anarchy
Where Two Rivers Meet.
Ashore you’ll find
A Ladder for Mr Oscar Wilde
to help you scale
The Ancient Boundary of Reading.
From there we’ll gather
On Big Flowery Hill to overhear
Christina the Astonishing recite
The Story of Willie Wimmers
to Cat Jeoffry
and The Sons of Macomish
(who used to scrump
My Neighbour’s Apples).
When she’s done, we’ll sing
the Winter Song
of Abattoirs to Zinzan
as we march along the Gridlines
to Broad Street Chapel, Reading;
here Apples, Berkshire, Cider
will be served.

To open The Prawn Season
we’ll pass a basket of
Bob Witherspoon’s Cherries
and call for The Granator’s Tale
of The Monmouth Rebellion
and the Bloody Assizes.
If anybody raises
What the Fridge Said last week,
we’ll chorus
a noisy Spring Song from
The Paul Petard Coffee Table Book.
As night comes on
Each Broken Object
will be dipped in Creosote,
hung from the Miletree
and set ablaze to light
A Much-Maligned Town.
After another Glass or two
the Diving Girl’s bound
to read aloud from the Monoprint
of The Ballad of Reading Gaol.
To end the day
we’ll sail
out to the Tideway
on The Drunken Boat.